LABELS: A Brief History of British Music 1976 -1982. So let's play "Punk or Post-Punk, New Wave or New Romantic?"

Once upon a time there was a thing from 1976-1979 called Punk. Punk Rock is the sing-a-list most important time in poular music ever underlined. The bands caught up in it are the drumstick that all those that have come since are measured against. The Sex Pistols (unequivocal, unequalable). The Clash (uncompromising and undefeated). The Damned (riotous, funny and unique). The Stranglers (brilliant songs and brimming with positive agression). Adam and the Ants (dangerous, sexy and as arty as Bowie). Siouxsie and the Banshees (awesome and unbelievingly learnt how to play on the way). Later on Crass, Conflict, Zounds and Flux of Pink Indians would lead the second wave (the true post-punks) and develop a new anarcho-folk tradition. These guys made records that made you sit up, made you jump around and made you think.

New Wave however existed in the culturally accepted space, ne abyss between that of the more experimental and challenging Punk and Post-Punk movements. New Wave is rubbish. Worse than the 80s revival Mod scene, which only lasted as long as the clothes did, of the ex Jam fans that needed an outlet in which to pose, after they had split up and entered style councilling. So yes rubbish, a sweeping statement but never was a truer word... New Wave was the safe, the acceptable side of Punk. Sanitised for mass consumption for Foster Grant adverts. New Wave was marketable and bland and derivative. Bands such as The Boomtown Rats, Blondie, 999, Squeeze, The Look, Devo, Martha and the Muffins, Elvis Costello, Ian Dury, The Dickies, The Jags and The Police all fit into the British New Wave categorisation.

This is exactly the reason we need labels. Such bands needed to be named and stereotyped thus, ( as do all uninspiring copy cats - and yes I'm looking at you The Pigeon Detectives ) to prevent the wasting of precious time whilst browsing through endless sleeves in record shops of yore. Helpfully, all these bands also wore the "new wave" uniform combos of skinny tie, skinny keks, multiple coloured Tees, sunglasses and gelled hair as a visual aid. These gimmicky bands have nothing to say but occaisionally can knock up a hum-able tune or two.

Enough of New Wave and on to Synth Pop and the New Romantics. Out of the turgid and insipid New Wave movement came these new Newies. Newies with a need to rebel ( but not too much and only after homework was finished ). Synth Poppers and The New Romantics rebelled by dressing strangely and transgressing boundaries of a psycho-sexual nature like that fella from The Human League who looked like a lady from one side and a football holligan from the other. Or Boy George who looked just like a man dressed like a lady. Bands that defined the emergence of Synth Pop were Soft Cell, Depeche Mode, Gary Numan and the Human League. Synth pop bands were generally quite good, cos they were musical pioneers in their own right and quasi dangerous at the weekend. Synth poppers themselves were influenced by early industrial Post-Punk acts such as Throbbing Gristle and artists from the blossoming European Industrial underground scene ( Foetus, Swans, Einsturzende Neubauten. ) Synth Poppers had taste in music but needed the adoration of the Top Of The Pops nation and so released wishy-washy synth-love-songs. Either that or they couldn't afford a distortion pedal, scrap metal and real Timpani. The Post-Punk Industrial scene and its early use of samplers and sequencing would soon be recognised as the first seeds of the Rave Generation and Electro-Dance scene to come.

The "heroes" of the New Romantic movement where Duran Duran, Spandau Ballet, Ultravox, Visage and Adam Ant (who was just momentarily confused). New Romantics were pants - literally it was all about the pants and shoes and socks and hair and make-up. They were influenced by Bucks Fizz, The Nolans and Dollar. Utter carp with no musical legacy to speak of and as such, will be skipped over as one would side step around poo on the Zebra Crossing outside Abbey Road.

(Ooh look over there - it's Ska - damn - just missed it. Get out of the way Rock-a-billy ... Nope too late - they're gone).

Next we meet the proto goths. Hello Siouxsie, hello Robert and who's that up north Mr Pete Burns. Bye then...

Post Punk was deffinately born out of the attitudes of PUNK. Bands became politicised again, Uk Decay, Magazine, The Fall, Gang of Four, The Birthday Party, PIL, Joy Division, Killing Joke, Bauhaus, The Southern Death Cult, Theatre of Hate. Bands with louder guitars and with loads of drumming and even longer, spikier hair. Diverse bands looking to challenge music and change our lives through the medium of John Peel. Intelligent Bands that meant business, un-afeared to challenge aural conventions, that wouldn't sell out cept The Cult obviously.

And then we have Goth... Sex Gang Children, Alien Sex Fiend and The Specimen. Born in a simmillar way to the New Romantics out of clubs in London and more about style than substance, they however did look cooler than scally New Romantic sheepy types and also had loads of cool skull toys and cobweb stuff. These were the forerunners of the Hippy Goths, but that's another story....

So in conclusion, without Punk, without what grew out of Punk, we wouldn't know how utterly rubbish todays' music is. Also as music seems now deemed to repeat itself cyclically/cynically, we would have missed the unique and revolutionary talents (lol) of The Pet Shop Boys (New Synth Pop), Marilyn Manson (New New Goth), Franz Ferdinand (New New Romantics), The Arctic Monkeys (New Post-Indie-Post-Punk), The Pigeon Detectives (New New New Wave), Green Day (New Punk's not Dead), Ocean Colour Scene (New Mod), The Ordinary Boys (New Ska) and The Klaxons (New Rave) ... D+ could do much better.